The Appendix Tolkien Forgot to Mention
by Miss2Pouty
Summary: A bit of meaningless fluff, i was bored. You don't really want to read this it's been done b4 much better.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Mr Tolkien and his estate own it all, and I'm not getting any money from it. Every so often I will try and borrow a character or 9 but that's not the point.  
  
A/N: This will just be a short story as I'm just typing it on a bored Friday afternoon, so enjoy (well if you can, I know that your cringing all ready. What can I say I like clichés. )  
  
The Appendix Tolkien Forgot To Mention  
  
  
  
Emilie ran to the door as fast as her ample legs would carry her, she reached somewhat out of breath. Instead of seeing the pizza guy a group of weird looking people stared back at her.  
  
"No I don't want to buy anything!" Emilie shouted as she pushed the door shut, a hand caught in the door and prised it open the hand was joined to an arm, the joined to (you'll never guess) a body, (and what a body!)  
  
A dark haired guy stood there, brooding eyes making Emilie's long legs go weak. "Miss you do not understand we have come to this strange world some how and this where we landed, all we ask is for your help."  
  
Emilie nodded "So your foreign, uh huh well do you want directions to your hotel or something?" Emilie leaned on the door hoping that her not so great balance would hold until the gorgeous tourist and his weird mates left.  
  
The rest of the guy friends sniggered at Emilie's words. The guy stood up straightening his shoulders showing his full height which was quite tall even for Emilie, "Miss must I spell it out to you, we are not from this world. I am Aragorn son of Arathorn."  
  
Emilie looked at the guy and all his friends yup there were nine, ever since the release of the Fellowship everyone had gone Lord of the Rings crazy. This was just the tip of an oversized geek iceberg. The guy was sooo sexy as well, just a shame that he was mad as two hatters. "And I suppose that that's the fellowship?"  
  
A smile crept to * Aragorn's * face "Yes please may we reside here until we know what to do."  
  
Emilie shook her head "No siree bob! There's no way that you're comin' in here! O.k geek boy get your damn sexy tight ass off my property."  
  
Aragorn hung his shoulders and turned. Emilie shut the door and walked back to living room where her friends were ogling over the fellowship on her T.V. Emilie walked in and stood in the doorway she recognised the guy on the screen almost immediately "Hey guys the guy at the door looked just like him."  
  
Babz turned her head "Yeah Whatever Emz. Pull the other one."  
  
Emilie just stood "I'm not kidding and he had a bunch of people with him. I didn't bother looking at them, y'know fellowship fan boys."  
  
Alison spoke eyes glued to the screen "Fan boys?!"  
  
Emilie crossed her arms "Yeah they even did the speech, y'know all Miss and may we reside."  
  
Alison sprang to her feet "Emilie did they say any more?"  
  
"Nope," Alison slouched "Oh yeah they did something about landing in this world, the most imaginative yet."  
  
Alison sprang to attention "THEY ARE THE FELLOWSHIP!"  
  
Emilie looked at Alison one eyebrow raised "How do you know?"  
  
Alison slid her eyes from side to side "Well, I um kinda ordered them over the Internet."  
  
Emilie's eyebrow moved higher up on her forehead "What?"  
  
Alison trying to pull off the 'I'm sweet and innocent' look that always got her out of trouble "I thought they were models."  
  
Sarah jumped from her position on the couch and ran past the girls through the door just giving Babz enough time to say, "Where are you going?"  
  
Sarah shouted as she opened the door "I'M GONNA GET FRODO!"  
  
All the girls bolted for the door, sprawling out onto the street. Each ran in a different direction covering more ground. It was Babz who found them first, followed by Alison and Sarah. Emilie took slightly longer to get them as she had stopped to tie her shoelace. Once there Emilie spoke to Aragorn "Sorry about the mix up, you can stay at my house for as long as you like." She smiled eyeing the rest of the fellowship behind him. Alison was right Legolas was rather hot in a 'I-look-more-like-a-girl-than-you-do' way.  
  
Alison stepped forward doing her look thing again, making Aragorn smile at her like she was a puppy. "Please it would be no trouble, we want to help…"  
  
Babz joined in "…you out of your clothes. Don't buy the butter wouldn't melt act she been perfecting it since forever, hi I'm Babz." She grabbed Aragorn's hand and shook it.  
  
Aragorn didn't seem to be bothered by the girls' ambush on his limb. "Pleased to meet you Babz." He husked.  
  
Babz went severely red "Um thanks."  
  
Sarah stared at Frodo her mouth wide open, she couldn't speak so Emilie did for her "My friend Sarah here thinks Frodo is a bit of sex…muffin."  
  
Sarah's brow creased "Muffin?!?"  
  
Emilie tinged slightly red around her ears "Well you can't exactly call him a God now, look at him. He's small, cute and probably tastes nice, just like a muffin."  
  
Sarah nodded slightly "I can understand the twisted logic in that, almost."  
  
Emilie spoke to Aragorn "Right well follow me we better get home." Her eyes flew open "Oh No!"  
  
Babz looked round now normal coloured "Oh no what?"  
  
Emilie spun round and began to run "I left the front door open!" She quickly sprinted off in the direction she came.  
  
Babz looked around and shrugged "Well I guess you follow me."  
  
LATER  
  
"So you think that you can teach me how to sword fight?" Babz asked a satisfied look on her face, Boromir looked quite satisfied to (he had just showed Babz his muscles).  
  
"Emz what happened to the pizza?" Babz hollered over to Emilie who at the moment was being shown how to tie up Alison's hair by Legolas.  
  
Emilie shrugged and shouted back "Dunno why?"  
  
Babz stood up and walked over to Emilie "Coz I'm starving."  
  
Emilie stood up and Legolas asked "Where are you going this is the best bit, all you have to do is…" He twisted Alison's hair into at the back of her head.  
  
Emilie silenced him "Shut it Princey. So who wants food?"  
  
Everyone looked up and smiled "K, hang on a sec I'll see what I can do."  
  
Merry and Pippin followed broad yet mischievous smiles spread across their faces. Pippin chirped "We'll help you Emilie."  
  
Merry joined in "Yes we'll help."  
  
A/N: Could please tell me what you think, I might just continue when I'm bored but hey who's countin'? 


	2. Leroy and Bruno

Disclaimer: I disclaimed in the last chapter but I'm just gonna do a general one for anything I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING THAT IS NOT MY OWN CHARACTERS, I GET NO MONEY FROM THIS. Just don't sue.  
  
  
  
Frodo turned to Sam who sat between him and Sarah and asked "Perhaps you should check on Emilie. Merry and Pippin can be quite a handful when they get a scheme into their heads."  
  
Sam knew a brush-off when he heard one; still it would be in Emilie's best interests if he did check. The fair-haired hobbit rose to his feet and followed the rabble into the kitchen. To his utter amazement the two younger hobbits were helping, or at first glance it looked that way. Emilie was reaching for something in a cupboard above the marble work surface; infact she was kneeling on the work surface head lost in the wooden box attached to the wall. Sam coughed to get the rooms attention and a thud was heard from above him. Emilie's scrunched up face appeared one hand nursing the back of her head she beamed (slightly) only one eye open "Hi Sam watdiya want?"  
  
Sam smiled back "Just to see if you needed any help."  
  
Emilie climbed down landing on the floor noisily "Nup I'm fine, but you hobbits sure like to help." She turned to Merry and Pippin, or where they were standing when she last looked. "Um did you see where those two went?" Sam shook his head. Emilie shrugged and opened a bag of tortilla chips dumping them in a bowl. She asked Sam a random question that popped into her head "So Sammy how are you enjoying Earth?"  
  
Sam walked over to her standing next to her and taking a chip from the bowl said, "Not much I can say I've only been here a short time." He bit into the chip "But the food is delicious! Did you make it yourself?"  
  
Emilie shook her head "'Fraid not."  
  
Sam shrugged grabbing a handful of chips and shovelling them into his mouth, "Shame I would of like some more."  
  
Emilie patted him on the head "Yeah o.k Sammy whatever." She reached up into the cupboard and brought down another bag "Here have this one all to yourself if you love them that much."  
  
Sam flung his arms around Emilie's knees "Thank you Miss Emilie."  
  
Emilie smiled "Don't call me that Sam my name is Emilie or Emz to my mates." She turned to the work surface and grabbed the handles for an immense tray that was laden with every type of un-healthy food you can imagine and a little healthy stuff too but just a tad. Sam wrestled with the bag of chips eventually giving up and asking Emilie to open it for him, Emilie put down the tray and ran her finger in his curly hair and took the bag from his hands pinching the bag and opening it first time. She was about to pick the tray up again when she could hear screams outside made her go to the back door (which is in the utility room attached to the kitchen for all you people who care). Emilie opened the door and was not surprised by what she saw, Merry and Pippin were screaming rooted to the ground where they stood. Bruno next doors dog had got into her garden again and was barking at the two scared hobbits, Bruno was only a Boxer and a puppy at that but he was close to almost the same size as Merry and Pippin. Emilie went forward and silenced Bruno "Now what are you doing in my garden again?" The dog bowed its head making the cute puppy noise "That's better now go home before I have to take you." The dog went through the hole in the fence it came through in the first place. Emilie turned to the trio of hobbits "I really should get that fixed."  
  
Merry and Pippin stood in awe of the brave giant and jumped forward "We'll do it! We'll do it! How did you manage to stop that beast?!?" Sam munched on his chips happily. Emilie shepherded the small people back into her house. They went through kitchen back to the living room.  
  
Emilie just about dropped her tray as she stepped into the living room; Gimli now had a pink sparkly beard with heir slides and clasps in it. Alison's hair was actually really nice but the thing that caught Emilie's rather short attention was a dark gleaming sword that was imbedded in her wall, She screamed "What the..!?!"  
  
Babz stepped forward biting her nails "I kinda had a sword fight with Boromir and it slipped out. Sorry."  
  
Emilie put the tray in Babz's hands and ran over touching where the blade disappeared into the wall "Crap! Well it could be called decoration I guess?" The room made a collective sigh. Babz put the tray into the middle of the room and everyone dived on the food while the girls tucked in to chocolate and sweets with too many e-numbers the fellowship sniffed and held the food suspiciously Emilie spoke handing Gandalf a bag of Haribo "It's nice honest."  
  
Gandalf looked into the bag and picked out one of the sweets surveying it before placing it in his mouth, he chewed quietly "Different I shall give you that."  
  
Emilie beamed at him "Cool!" She jumped to her feet and raced out of the room.  
  
Legolas turned to Sarah who was in the middle of drinking some form of carbonated drink "Where has she gone this time?"  
  
Sarah shook her head and gulped down some juice "Dunno she gets like this every so often, you have to literally scrape her down from the ceiling."  
  
Legolas slumped "Great."  
  
In a matter of seconds Emilie came back phone in hand and smile across her face "Leroy's brining pizza over so don't eat too much."  
  
Alison smiled back "C'est super!"  
  
Babz pushed her on the arm "That's my language just coz you got a 1 in French doesn't mean that you can use it!"  
  
* Ned/Chav/ schemey speak * Alison smiled and squared up to her "You startin' sumthin'?"  
  
Babz did the same "Aye and what yae gonna do aboot it!"  
  
Alison bobbed her head from side to side "I'll smash yae!"  
  
Babz stood up "'Mon then!"  
  
Alison stood up too trying to contain a smile "Right here right now you and me!"  
  
Babz bobbed on the tips of her toes, Emilie and Sarah were in fits of laughter as the two play fought. The fellowship were alarmed and looked at the two girls (being Sarah and Emilie), as though they were grotesque Orcs. Aragorn shouted "Are you going to let them fight?!"  
  
Emilie smiled "Yeah it's sooo funny."  
  
Aragorn looked at Emilie with disgust "You are sick and filthy."  
  
Emilie turned to him no longer laughing "Are you sure you want to say that?"  
  
Aragorn pulled himself from the ground and walked over to where Emilie was "Yes I have said now and will not it back."  
  
Emilie straightened up "Fine then have it your way." She leapt on Aragorn knocking him on a strategically placed couch (by me teehee) and began tickling him (he does have a great body you now you would too!). Eventually he was paralysed with laughter Emilie lifted one eyebrow "Do you give in?"  
  
Aragorn pushed her over his breathing sharp and erratic "Never!" A broad grin donning his face.  
  
Legolas was the first to speak first "Aragorn are you all right? That looks very dangerous."  
  
Emilie spoke as she stood up "Aren't all the fun things in life dangerous?"  
  
Sarah, Babz and Alison simultaneously burst out laughing leaning on each other for support. Sarah said trying to compose herself "See what I mean about the ceiling." Legolas shrugged and sat back down. Emilie tried to fix her hair when the door went. She sprinted to the door and came back a girl with plumb coloured hair was behind her Emilie introduced her "Everyone meet Leroy."  
  
The girl smiled "That's not actually my name its Leanne."  
  
All the girls ran forward and had a big group hug whilst making girl-hug noises (i.e. eeeeeeeeeee!). Boromir spoke to Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli "For some reason I find this rather erotic." The rest nodded shifting position. 


End file.
